Perhaps a few words on authority in general would be of some benefit. Most of us have been conditioned by the world to view authority only as power and control over others. We have been trained to accept that those in authority have dominance or command over people. In other words, to be authoritarian is to be stern, strong willed, rigid and domineering. Consider our Heavenly Father’s departure from that format when He chose Moses to lead His children out of Egypt, with full authority over them.
Moses, about 80 years of age, was called aside by God while tending his Ethiopian Father-in-law’s sheep clear out on the backside of the desert. Told by God to go to Egypt, Moses could only muster a very non-assertive, “Who am I?” That does not sound like the voice of authority as we have learned it. Because he couldn’t speak well, his Brother Aaron went to speak for him. Later, after the Lord performed many miracles through him (the plagues of Egypt, parting the Red Sea, bringing water from the rock, receiving the Ten Commandments, etc.), God still described Moses as very meek, above all men on the face of the earth. This account was of the rebellion by Aaron and Miriam against Moses’ rule. (Num. Chap. 12) The love of God, unimpeded by his pride, prompted Moses to pray for God to heal Miriam of leprosy with which she was afflicted as punishment for her rebellion. His meekness enabled him to be merciful, not macho. Each time the people rebelled, Moses interceded for them because he, if no one else, knew their rebellion was against God, not him, and that God would enforce His orders.
Authority has been established by God to maintain order in His Kingdom and He will not allow man to use it to elevate or glorify himself. Jesus, a lowly carpenter, is known as the Lamb of God because of His meek ways. Jesus described himself (The King of Kings) thus; “For I am meek and lowly of heart.” (Mat. 11:29)
It surely follows that, in the Kingdom of God, leaders and men in authority under God are meek and humble. Realizing our authority has been granted by almighty God will give us pause to reflect and season it with love. Recognition of God’s steadfastness to enforce His Word by His Power will encourage obedience from those who know and fear the living God. No man is capable of dealing with rebellion in the heart of his wife, or anyone else, and any attempt to do so is only counterproductive and requires action by him of equal or greater sin than the original. The only way to deal with rebellion is by the example of Moses, from an attitude of love and intercessory prayer, pleading God’s mercy upon the offender. Is this not the way of a servant?
The loving advice given in 1 Peter 3:1-6 (identical to Paul’s but with the added credibility of coming from a married man living with his wife) which admonishes wives to be in subjection to their own husbands, does not provide that she first determine if he is right. Peter said, “Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord.” He also called a woman’s adornment, “a meek and quiet spirit which is, in the sight of God, of great price. In verse 7, husbands are instructed to give “honor to the wife as unto the weaker vessel, and being joint heirs together of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.” If failure to honor our wives will hinder our prayers, God must be serious indeed. Love is not optional in the Kingdom of God.
By now there must be at least a few questions regarding the position of unmarried women in the authority of God as most references tell women to be obedient to their own husbands (and sage advice it is). Most materials on this subject deal with much straining at gnats, swallowing of camels and clever manipulation of Scripture proving opposite points. What remains is to submit ourselves completely to the Father as He instructs us by His Holy Spirit in our answer to this as well as every other question arising over relationships with one another. If we need rigid commandments or rules, we missed Jesus. He didn’t demand His rights or to be right, He suffered and died on the cross to free us from the law of sin and death. His LOVE for us transcended everything else as He demonstrated the MORE PERFECT WAY.